Why did I go to College?

                I always knew I wanted to go to college from a young age. I had big dreams of becoming a doctor and taking care of sick kids. As time went on things in life change, yes I still had the same dream but my circumstances changed. When I got to my senior year of high school I started to take post-secondary classes and knew I wasn’t ready to go to college right away. I had a difficult time focusing and knew it would be a waste of time to try college at that stage of my life. I chose to enter the working world and do some life lessons through on the job training. Throughout my life I got the itch to go back to school and would try, but it never seemed like the right time and I’d quit.

                I was doing good with the work experience and advancement through job training. Then came the day I found out I was pregnant. I knew at this time I needed to make a change because as I was doing okay, I knew I wasn’t doing well enough to take care of me and my child. I sat down and did a lot of research on the best program and school for me before making my choice. I knew I had to do better for my son and here I am fourteen years after high school going back to college. For me I think this is the best decision I could have made. While I knew I could struggle through and make it work, I wanted better for my family. So at this time in my life college was the right choice, as it never was before.

Writing Process

I have never been sure on what my writing process is and to this day I’m not 100% sure. I think it depends on what I’m writing about and what I know on the subject. When it comes to research papers I always thought I have a good grasp on them, however now days I’m not so sure. When I was in high-school I always looked forward to research papers and learning as much as I could about the subject at hand. I’m not so sure of this now. Maybe it’s the fact that I haven’t had to write a paper in a long time but I have seemed to have lost my excitement about research papers. While I still like to learn about the topic, I’m finding it harder to put my thoughts and knowledge down in a paper. For me I think that if it’s something I’m passionate about it makes it harder, for there is so much information to learn and going on in my head it’s hard to put it into words. My mind is whirling with so much information and opinions it makes it hard to tell which is which and they become confused with each other. I actually think for me it is easier to be given a subject to write about so I’m more focused. I guess after so many years my writing process is still a mystery to even me and at times makes writing difficult. 

Logical Fallacies

Logical fallacies are a tricky thing in themselves. We know the popular one for all kids these day, or you could say always has been, is that everyone is doing it. My brothers were big on using this argument on our parents. Anytime they wanted to do something that they knew our parents weren’t in favor of, out came the “but mom everyone else is doing it.” While this didn’t always work sometimes they would give in and let them think they had won. Now, my brother was always inventive when he really, really wanted something and would change up his argument. I’m not sure you would consider it a logical fallacies or not, as he used the opposite of his usually argument. One year my brother really wanted to attend this summer camp that was being offered. He knew darn well that he regular argument, “but everyone is doing it,” wasn’t going to work as no one he knew was going to the camp. When it came time to sit down my mom and step dad to convince them to let him go, he shocked us all. He casually explained the camp and of course got the usually, “we’ll think about it” response. This didn’t deter him through and the next thing he said had shock value. He looked straight at my mom and step dad saying, “But no one else is doing it and I want to be different.” I couldn’t believe it, we all just stared at him for a minute. I think my parents were expecting the same argument as always they were shocked into letting him get his way and go. They just looked at each other and said, “Who are we to stand in the way of letting him be different.” So that summer my brother was off to his camp while the rest of us were stuck at home.

Daycare Issues

Daycare is a big issue for me. My son has been home with me for the first 15 months of his life and it becomes hard for me to put my trust in others to take care of him. I know no one can give him the care that I would myself, but the debate comes in who can do it best. Which brings me to the question of what is better, home daycare or daycare center?  I have talked to many people, and of course everyone has a different opinion so I still am confused. I have heard many horror stories of things happening at home daycare, more than I have at centers. However, does that mean that they are better? I tend to think so after I have looked at many daycares over time to pick the right one for my son.

                In my opinion someone running a home daycare is more at risk of becoming stressed and taking it out on the kids they are watching. While in a center there is other support staff they can call to relieve them if they are feeling stressed. Also, in a home daycare they are with the kids constantly with no break unlike in a center where they are giving a break to decompress. Now I’m not saying this is the choice for everyone, just my opinion. Another issue I had is the education my son would receive while in daycare. This again I feel he gets more of at a center versus home daycare. While in a home the children range in all ages making it hard to design a learning activity that fits all the children. In a center the children are with other children of the same age and thus making the learning environment more stable. The last thing I had to consider was supervision. Who is there to supervise the home daycare and report to you anything that happens? That’s right; no one all you have is the word of the care taker themselves. While in the center you have the care givers in the room, the director, and the cameras throughout the facility.

                In the end my choice was a center, however this may not be the choice for everyone. Whatever choice you make be sure to do your research, as our children are important and deserve the best there is out there. Good luck if you end up in my shoes and having to make the right choice, it’s a hard one.

The Glass Castle

Reading The Glass Castle this semester was an eye opener for me. I also knew that there was these type of problems in our world, but to get a firsthand look from the perspective of someone who lived it makes it that much more real. Do I think that it was a good book, yes. I think this should be a must read in all English class rooms. Not only because I find it a good book but it brings forth some important problems in our world today. This book would help young people see first-hand through their reading what someone in certain situations goes through. I think it would also help someone who is in the same kind of situation deal with what is happening to them and help them learn there are options out there. I think that there are so many kids in the world who are dealing with hard times and have no clue of the help or resources out there; they think they are the only ones dealing with it. This book opens up a new world of understanding, not only for the ones living with the abuse, but also to give others an idea of what to look for to help and understand.

Tattoos

Tattoos use to be a sign of a trouble maker or that someone has been to prison, which is still the case in today’s society. However, with the changing times more and more people are into the art of tattoos. In some societies a tattoo marks your journey into manhood, while in others it’s a sign of respect and worth you bring to the village or community. Tattoos can mean so many different things to different people, cultures or society in general.

              

  I have always been fascinated by the elements of tattoos. I got my first one on my eighteenth birthday and since have gotten two others. In my way of thinking tattoos are a way to express a time or special memories throughout your life. While I think they are an expression of one’s self, I also think people should be careful to make sure they can live with this art for life not just the time and place they are in life when they get it. My tattoos so far are all simple and be chosen to represent a time in my life, but are all something I could live with even in old age. As my life has progressed I have others I would like to get that represent one a great tragedy and one of great joy. I would like to express my memories in a memorial tattoo to my grandfather, who helped raise me, and to the birth of my son who changed my world.  However, I’m at a standstill, as the cost is higher than I can part with at this time, but I will in time express my memories in the art of tattoo soon.

Functional or Dysfunctional

What makes a family functional or dysfunctional? Well if you have even a fraction of what my family is like, we are a mix of both.  In my opinion most families that are functional have a little dysfunctional in the mix. Who are we really to say what is functional or dysfunctional, as these mean different things to everyone. What one may call a functional family, may be quite dysfunctional to another or vice versa. When it comes to my family it seems the dysfunction actually makes us function as a family. Take out these few differences and we become a 100% totally dysfunctional family, instead of a functional family with a few dysfunctions. So why labels are easy for us to throw around when we see something that fits into our definition of functional and dysfunctional, this isn’t how others truly see the same things. I think it’s safe to say that every family have elements of both and work in their own unique way to make up the family dynamic.

A Child's First Circus

Over the first weekend of April, I got to see my son experience a lot of first. My favorite being his first time at the Circus, which he just wasn't to sure about at the start. Of course, Grandma and Grandpa had to spoil him with everything there was to have. When we first arrived, it was down for the first pony ride and too get a close look at the elephants. No one braved the ride on the elephant with him so this year that was not part of the experience. As we were sitting in our seats waiting for the fun to start, he just looked around in amazement at all the people around us.
The real fun I think for him started when the lights went down and all the bright lights of the Circus came to life. He was just amazed with all the flashing lights throughout the arena. This was another spoil alert as Grandpa had to by him three different light up toys after the intermission. I'm not sure how much he really followed the acts of the circus as time when, but he fell in love with the lights of the Circus. Oh, let me not forget the music you could catch him dancing to in his seat. All in all I would have to say the first Circus was a success.

"Fakebook Generation" Do We Friend Our Parents?

Do we accept our parents as friend on Facebook? Many people come across this issue everyday. Personally I don't see why so many people find that this is a problem. I have many of my family members that are my friends on Facebook. The only reason that I could see why someone would be against this would be if they had something to hide. 

With the way technology is expanding these days you should know never to post something on the internet that you would be ashamed for your family or others to see. I read an article the other day in which it stated that employers may start to have the right to ask for your information to you personal pages. Even if they are not granted this right there is always that chance that someone you work for or a family member will at some point see what you are posting. Just ask yourself, "Is what I'm writing worth losing my job or hurting my family?" 

Here is an example of what might happen if you bash someone on Facebook, especially your family.

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.litefm.com%2Fcc-common%2Fmainheadlines3.html%3Ffeed%3D421220%26article%3D9738000&h=fAQE8EN6dAQFYCVl4KtVZ2Qu-Xv5M2uK8qzjLN2URo3ZiFQ&enc=AZPuY8xVGlsuAkNxuesWKYSVKIjPWBFAs2goQoFZNgvmA4ioVAvuY49b3KEQEW0GA6YBD7ZTyB7IvuL91crqts2f

So I think it is important to remember, whether you add your parents or not there is always a way for them to find out. Have respect for them and yourself and don't post negative things that could hurt someone. It not only your parents you should worry about, just take in account the bullying that is now happening through Facebook and other social sites. Soon we may see the freedom of these sights have more of a negative impact then good.

Struggles of A Single Parent

I have found out the many challenges of being a single parent in the last few months. It has become a challenge to juggle all the balls that make up my life that is for sure. My son has defiantly hit the terrible two's at the age of 14 months, which has made things a struggle. So as I struggle to keep the house clean, homework done, and him out of trouble i'm sure worn out at the end of the day.  I have also struggled with the financial aspects of this as well and now I will be adding a part time job soon into the mix as well.

For all of you out there that are also in my situation or have taken on even more, good luck. I have sure struggled but I know in the end that it's all for the better. I'm also thankful for my family who has been there when needed.

Grandpa, My hero

As a little girl I always looked up to my grandpa, he was a very influential part of my life. I can remember spending everyday after school at my grandparent, but the best part was when grandpa came home from work. See we had a ritual where he would come home and I would sit on his lap telling him about my day as we ate chocolate stars. Grandma use to get so mad at us and yell at grandpa that he was going to spoil my supper by giving me candy. Of course grandpa would just laugh and say that's my right, she's my little angel. I was the first born granddaughter and my grandpa was good at spoiling me, which I loved.

Even after all these years I can still hear his laugh, smell the smell that was my grandpa, and feel his arms hold me tight. He had one of those unique smells of a mix of coffee, cigarette smoke, grease and car fumes. I know weird huh, but my grandpa had been a mechanic all his life and to me it was the best smell ever.

As I grew up he would take me with him to work and taught me as much as I could absorb about cars, which I wish I could remember today. See I can't even go back and ask for a refresher as my grandpa had died when I was fourteen.

That day was one of the worst days ever in my young life. I had come home from school and my mom told me he was gone and all I could do was tell her she was lying, he would never leave me. My only regret was I never got to say goodbye, and he's not here so my kids can know how great he was.

See my grandpa was my hero, he was the man I looked up too. He was the most loving and caring person I know and he will forever be missed. This year I will be getting the greatest reminder of him that will be with me forever. I will be getting a memorial tattoo that I can carry as a constant reminder of the man who stole my heart at a young age and is forever missed.

WE LOVE YOU GRANDPA, YOU WILL FOREVER BE MISSED!!!!

Inspiration

"All things in life happen for a reason!"

Such a common saying but this is how I believe my life has come to be. I never thought as a younger person that my actions would influence my life today as an adult so much. Growing up I definitively had my ups and downs, sometimes it seemed more downs.

My life seemed to take a turn at the age of fourteen right after my parents divorce was final. Till this time in my life you could have said I was a close to perfect kid. I had never gotten in trouble and was getting straight A's in school. Then that one year changed everything and my life began to spiral. I started rebelling with the best of them and lets just say I got in my share of trouble through the years. I tried to pull myself up and out of the rut I had dug but it just wasn't working.

My life continued to be shaky and I moved away, however I was always drawn back. It took me a few years but after high school I seemed to pull my life back together little by little. Now as I sit here and look back on the troubled days of my youth, along with the hurt I caused my family, I know it was my plan in life.

Sure it may sound stupid but if all those things hadn't happened to me then I would have never learned the lessons that have made me into the person I am today. Without the pain and the suffering I would have never known love and happiness. So yes I now believe everything happens for a reason, for without who we were there would be no who we are today.

So the next time something in your life is hard, just remember it's all for a reason. Good or bad what happens in life shapes the person you are meant to be, so hang in there what is meant to be will be.

Continued Journey of Education

    Where my journey began was the age of seven, there I stood in the hospital with a new little brother who was very sick. As it turned out he was born with pneumonia and had to be flown to another, bigger hospital. So there I stood outside the NICU watching them prepare him to be flown out and I looked at my mom and said, "I'm going to be a baby doctor when I grow up."

     Well as you can see I didn't make it there yet, somewhere along the way I lost track of that dream. Sure I eventually went back to school for CMA and then for EMT but nothing ever stuck. I just continued to drift through life. I never had a problem finding work and supporting myself but as time went it just didn't feel right anymore.

     You may ask so what changed, why know? Well do you see that little boy in the picture, that's what happened. That little man was my saving grace and changed my life forever. My son was born just a little over a year ago when I was at what I would call a low point of my life. I knew the moment he was born things had to change, no more living day to day.

    I sat down with my mom and sought out her advice on a route to take and here I am, a 31 year old single mom working toward my degree. I knew from the start it was going to be a challenge, however the end result is so worth it. I know now that I have a starting point and a goal to reaching a better future for my son and me. Sure it may not be the dream that started in my head at age 7 but who's not to say I can't with time fulfill that dream as well, only time will tell.

     So my advice to all of you out there that feel lost, don't give up. Things maybe hard now but like I always say, "It's more satisfying when you know you worked hard for what you have."